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ANDREW'S
RANTS ARCHIVE #6 THE ANDREW' RANTS ARCHIVE OF PAST COLUMNS ANDREW'S RANTS ARCHIVE #1 ANDREW'S RANTS ARCHIVE #2 ANDREW'S RANTS ARCHIVE #3 ANDREW'S RANTS ARCHIVE #4 ANDREW'S RANTS ARCHIVE #5 CURRENT ANDREW'S RANTS ANDREW'S RANTS ARCHIVE #7 ANDREW'S RANTS ARCHIVE #8 |
JULY
16th, 2007 |
HARRY
POTTER AND THE ORDER OF THE PHOENIX I saw the movie with a sense of dread going in. I had read the book and to date it was the only one by JK Rowling that was boring. In fact, I am of the opinion that it was "ghost-written". The book was nothing like the ones that came before it stylistically and failed to hold my interest. The one that came after it called "The Half Blood Prince" is a much better work and back up to her usual writing standards. This along with the fact that the critics panned the movie made me even consider waiting for the DVD rather than shilling out the 9 bucks to sit in a crowded theatre at midnight to see a sneak preview of the movie. As it is I only have two problems with the film, but first let me say this, it was a Good Movie. Not great, not bad, but good. It held my interest and really further developed the Potter story and characters rather than resolve any world shaking issues other than Voldemort is back, which we all already knew. I think the critiques are so trained for car-chases and explosions they wouldn’t understand suspense and drama if it bit them on the ass. They still expect the Harry Potter of the past and what they don’t realized is that Mrs. Rowling is ageing her characters and story composition to match the age of her original readers. Harry isn’t like the Hardy Boys and doesn’t live in a static world and never age. He is growing up on film right before our very eyes. Just like the readers who are now in their late teens and early 20s. The last movie saw some serious moments with Cedrick's death but still had the frivolity of the Quiddich matches and the Tri-Wizard tournament. This time around there is no mention of Quiddich and its some serious stuff going on with a lot of political shuffling and under-handed dealings along with downright murder and sorcery battles and a major character's death. This along with a load of character development bring us closer to the figures in this movie than ever before. It is not a stand-alone movie and sets the stage for further story line development in the next film which should end with a Bang! - Dumbledore’s Death at the Hands of Snape as Harry watches. So my impression is not bad, not great but a good movie that leaves you wanting more. Now the two problems I had with the movie. One was the Giant that looked like a Harryhausen creation not the CGI creature it was supposed to be. It was as lifeless and plastic looking as Claymation. And second and more importantly were the 12 commercials lasting a half an hour I was forced to sit through before we even got to the movie previews. What the hell am I paying 9 dollars for when they are selling a half an hour of add space before the movie. I cant change the channel or get up cause someone will steal my seat. I am a captive audience forced to watch one stupid product endorsement after another. I don’t mind the previews at all but the forced 'crappy' Coke ads and the 'Newest Car' they are trying to convince me is 'Cool' are not something I give a Damn about. I would love to play Roshambo with the Marketing Director that was responsible for the add-placement & quantity and kick him "right Squaaah inna nut sack". |
JULY
17th, 2006 |
WORLD
STARVATION 2500 children each day die of starvation each day according to the television commercial featuring the actor who used to play 'Trapper John MD'. He sits there in the squallier of the same type of village that Sally Struthers used to visit and tells you how your dollar can help prevent this tragedy. Where do I begin with this one? If we propagate this system they live in they just breed like flies and the problem gets bigger not less. We have been throwing money and missionaries at these situations for literally centuries and it has done no good. The British missionaries started trying to educate and help them as early as the late 1590s. Some people have lived their time and as a culture have stagnated and need to move aside for something new. Seriously does anyone remember the Etruscans, or the original Nordic settlers in Vineland or the Rapa Nu. What about those chaps that originally lived on Easter Island or the Peruvian culture that built Machupichu. Then there were the original Romans whose culture fell to the Gauls, or Lemuria-mu, the Vikings, Incas, Aztecs, Picts, and many, many more. All of their societies ceased to exist. They either adapted or died out. Some were changed through breeding with other cultures, as was the case with the Vikings, while others were sublimated into a bigger conquering culture or in some instances they just plain DIED OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!! The Red Cross wasn’t there to keep their stagnant, non-productive, miserable lives and culture going. Our universe is an ever-changing one and if you can’t learn to adapt you will die. I speak from experience having been on missionary trips to some of these god-forsaken, mud-pit-fly- infested pestholes. These people have no desire to get ahead or improve their lot in life. They just expect the rest of the world to support them in their never-ending quest to laze around and make more babies. I have been to South Africa and Chili, Peru and even supposedly civilized countries like Czechoslovakia and everywhere the problem is the same. Human apathy. Even here in the USA it is a huge problem. You will either have the verve and will to get ahead in life and support yourself and make something of your miserable existence or you don’t. It can’t be taught or given to someone, you are just born with it. Now lets get back to the 5 hundred thousand per year children who starve with 'Trapper'. There are not 2500 kids a day in the Far and Middle East that die of starvation. According to World Health Organization there are not that many people dying of starvation worldwide each day let alone this little rat pit 'Trapper' is in. According to Matthew White in his book 'The Historical Atlas of the 20th Century' there were a total of 44 million people who died of starvation for the whole century. He has all the deaths for the whole century broken down into specifics such as war, murder, accidents, self-inflicted wounds and so on. According to him and the World Health Organization this comes out to be about 1205 deaths a day worldwide due to starvation. That’s worldwide. Robert Gilliam in his article 'Can we Find Peace in a World with Inequitable Distribution of Wealth Among Nations', points out that as the gross national product rises the death rate due to infant mortality and starvation drops proportionally. What’s this all mean? It means that the liberal agenda is to create a problem or a crisis and then propose a way for your money to fix it. By giving them your money you ensure that the system keeps going and receiving all of its government assistance. While Wacko, Liberal Enviro-nuts can set back and soak up the power and glory and feel good about doing something by using your money. What we should be concerned about is the poverty and hunger in our own country. When we have all of that solved then we can go sticking our noses into other countries and making up statistics about how bad off they are. |
JULY
3rd, 2006 |
RAIN
FOREST DESTRUCTION Give me a break. When I was a kid we called it the Jungle and it would eat you alive in a second. Now the Enviro-Nazzies have prettied it up and it's all friendly with that sure fire cure for cancer just hanging on the vine like the Garden of Eden and it's called "The Rain Forest". Bullshit, it’s still the wild dangerous Jungle with Tarzan and all the Bomongani. Also, they make it seem that the countries involved are just bull dozing the Jungle down for the hell of it for fun every afternoon. Let's just all have a big party and just burn it all down, we got nothing else to do but piss off the rest of the world. I’m afraid not. That is nowhere near what is happening. They are practicing land management and harvesting select trees and then replanting. Even those '3rd World Morons' know that if you just cut it all down it is gone. No, they go in and sometimes clear cut for construction but in 99 % of the cases it's selective cutting and replanted after they have moved on. The same is true in North America. Everyone screams about virgin timber. Let me tell you something, if this group doesn’t know a thing or two about trees by this time, considering the amount of time we have spent among them each year, then it’s a sad thing. Every tree dies. There are no ‘Ents’ in the woods, no eternal trees, and No Virgin Timber. Get it - 'No Virgin Timber'. It has all been burned down by natural causes at one point or another or stricken by blight bugs or diseases. Hell, even our precious Gorge with all its magnificent trees has been clear-cut in entirety several times in the past 150 years, just go to the Ranger Station and ask to see the photos or look in any book documenting the Red River Area. Virgin timber? Baaahumbug! Trees are not eternal. They live 3 or 4 centuries in the best of cases more often much less. They die fall down and new ones grow in their place. In fact, if you go to the US Department of Forestry and Agriculture you will find that there is more land under forestation at the present time than ever before in the last 1500 years in North America due to forest fire fighting practices and land management that promotes wetland and forest preservation. All the Enviro-Nazzies bitch that we are destroying the oxygen producing trees and that we will all suffocate in a hundred years, which is, once again, leftist, Marxist, lying, liberal bullshit. Remember, that the Earth's surface is covered 2/3 by salt water and all that supports the largest living ecosystem on the planet the root of which is algae. According to NOAA, the National Oceanic and Aeronautic Association, algae creates 97.8 percent of the Earths’ oxygen supply, not the freaking oak tree in your back yard. It’s the millions of square miles of photosynthetic algae blooms that number in the quin-trillions and form the base foundation for all of life as we know it here on Earth, that are responsible for keeping that precious 15 % oxygen content supplied to the mixture of gasses we breath. Do you want to know what the best thing you can do with a tree is? Chop it down and make something out of it like a baseball bat to smack a Hippie or Liberal with. Guess what, it will grow back. That’s why it’s called a 'Renewable Resource'. If the Enviro-Nuts want to bitch let them go off about Non-Renewable Resources like Coal that really damages the land when they Strip Mine. You don’t find Tree Huggers out there chaining themselves to rock faces chanting save the coal now, do you? You know why? It's because its harder to anthropomorphize anthracite coal. You can identifywith a graceful tree, gently swaying in the wind easier than with a mere rock under your feet. Think about it. Oh, there’s also the fact that coal miners wouldn’t give a shit if they killed a few Hippies in the process of mining. All of these and more factors keep them from looking at the environment logically and protesting the true damaging aspects of our consumption based society. |
JUNE
19th, 2006 |
OVERCROWDING Now this one is so easy that a child should be able to see the fallacy of the statement. The eggheads who write all the articles about overcrowding all live in big cities and fight that rush hour traffic and have to make dinner reservations 3 weeks ahead of time just to get into McDonalds. Sure to them the world looks crowded as they jostle a million other people for a space on the subway. Ask a farmer in Kansas if it’s overcrowded. His nearest neighbor lives farther away than the entire city of New York. I have driven across this country from coast to coast several times. When you do that you get a perspective that flying doesn’t allow you. If you fly its bam and there you are 6 hours or less and you are across the entire continent. Try driving it. After a few days you realize that you have been driving for about 5 hours and all you have seen are trees and shrubs but not a single human being. We have more land and food than we can use its just that people like to crowd into large groups and clan together. Most times this happened throughout history the black plague or some other disease would come along and attack the areas with the worst living conditions and bingo about ¾ of the earth’s population would die out. Now with the modern miracle of treated water and sewer systems and antibiotics we can stuff more people than ever before into ever-smaller spaces thanks to high rise buildings. New York, Tokyo, Saul Palo, Koala Lumpur, and more. Literally billions crammed into housing that is so small and tight that our southern bathrooms are spacious by comparison. Sure to these fools the world seems crowded because it is but I have been to places where there was no one in sight nor any indication of another human at all. Once on a trip to the western part of the USA I drove through the cornfields of what seemed most of Kansas. It was literally hundreds of miles of either corn or just flat land as far as you could see. In New Mexico and Arizona I saw tracts of land where the road signs would say next gas 300 miles and they were not kidding. I have been to other countries like Australia where we went to Ayers rock. It was a 6-hour drive over empty moonscape land and swamps, jungle and desert to reach it and the only sign of human habitation was the tourist rest areas along the road. In Europe there are areas in the Black Forest that stretch for thousands of miles where no one lives and has not for thousands of years since the Picts moved out to become civilized. We got space on this planet, we got more space than we can use. Its just all the monkeys no longer live in the jungle but decided to move to the zoo and the zoo is crowded believe me I been there too and the zoo is definitely crowded. So my solution is move out if you don’t like it. Stop bitching about it and look further away than a Jersey suburb and think about those vast uninhabited tracts of land available to anyone who wants to live there. Hell, look at Vegas it was once a piece of flat desert with nothing more than scorpions and buzzards. Now thanks to the Mob, its one of the largest vacation spots on the planet ranking right up there with Disney World and the famous Black Gold Festival in Perry County KY. A few facts here to back up my statements as provided by http://www.nemw.org/popdensity.htm the states of NY and NJ have a population density of 1134 people per square mile. But if you think that’s crowded its nothing to Washington DC where the density sits at 9317 bureaucratic monkeys per square mile. On the other hand North Dakota boasts a 9, Montana a 6 Wyoming a 5 and Alaska has 1 person per square mile on the average. We got space people just move out of the freaking cities and live in the country. Hell with satellite you can still get your broadband and 200 high def video channels no matter where you are. |
JUNE
5th, 2006 |
EL
NINO OK, do I have to say it again? We live in an active environment. Nothing stays the same. If ocean currents change it is not the end of the world, nor is it caused by anything we did. Our opinion of ourselves is highly overrated. We think so much of ourselves just because we can think; but, in the grand scheme of things we don’t matter one whit to the environment. Sure if we set off a couple of Nukes every week or so it would adversely affect things but we don’t do that. The fact is that all of the pollution put out by the entire human population during the past 500 years and that includes the coal burning industrial revolution does not even begin to equal the amount of toxic gasses ash dirt radioactive elements and just pure trash that Mount St Helens spewed into the upper atmosphere over a weeks time. Yes, that’s right, the Earth pollutes itself perhaps we should regulate that as well. No more Volcanoes, it’s causing global warming and killing life as we know it. Stupid 'Environazzies' go to the United States Department of Geology web site and read up on just how much junk is ejected into the air on a really big Volcano. We as humans don’t matter any more than a flea on an elephant to the Earth at our present rate of pollution. So go ahead smoke a cigarette, burn your trash, dump your sewage in the creek the Catfish love it. |
MAY
22nd, 2006 |
THE
OZONE HOLE The Ozone Hole is another of those things that’s been here long before us. You can go to the US Department of Agricultures site and find some astonishing facts that will make you wonder why doesn’t anybody take this information and shove it down the Environmental-Wacko-Liberal-Goose-Stepping Gender-Bending-Left-Wing-Nutso-Democratic-Enviro-Nazzis throats. From tree ring growth patterns which we have records of back as far as 80,000 years we can see certain weather patterns and growth cycles from all over the Earth. We can tell if a climate was hot, cold, dry, or wet. We can see if there were fires and how long growing seasons were. We can tell what kind of bugs lived on or in the trees and what kind of fungi thrived. Both of which have an abundant range of knowledge associated with their respective fields of study. What I’m getting at is there is clear irrefutable evidence that there was an ozone hole 80,000 years ago and we sure as hell weren’t spraying CFCs into the air back then or using cars with those Ohhhh Sooooo Evil Exhaust Fumes. It’s a Crock. We got rid of CFC use almost completely over 20 years ago and it didn’t make a bit of difference. In fact if you want to know the truth every electric motor on earth produces ozone as a byproduct of its operation. That’s right every refrigerator out there is helping the Ozone by running that compressor 24 hours a day. RF11 is a less effective gas than Freon and yet we don’t use it because some Enviro-Nazzi said we were destroying the Ozone Layer so now we’ve got to use something more expensive and less effective so people can feel good about themselves. Just another prime example of how it’s more important to feel good about your convictions than be actually right about them. It’s the intent that counts not the truth. So Yes, there is a Seasonal Ozone Hole. It’s always been there and always will be. It’s affected by the Toridoral Rotation of the Earth and the Van Allen Electromagnetic Field around the Earth. It’s also affected by Sunspot Activity and Background Solar Winds. Not Cow farts and hair spray. I think we should take all the Environut Hippies to the South Pole and make a little Commune right under where the Hole appears and force them to live there so they can feel justified in their panic. |
MAY
8th, 2006 |
THE
RANT and RAVE Several weeks ago my lovely wife brought to my attention that what I do on this site is not Rant and Rave its more like a Madman let loose on an unsuspecting Innocent Society and was the 100 percent raving of a Mad Lunatic. I got to thinking about it and realized she was WRONG and that what I have to say is so important that many of you might feel a sense of loss of direction if I was to stop (Allow me my fantasies OK). So for the next few weeks I decided to touch upon some Politically Correct Topics that the Liberal Left likes to push upon us. The Environmental Wacko Groups will tell us all sorts of salacious lies to further their own causes regardless of the facts. It's more important to have good intentions than actually be right and if you happen to contradict them with facts or hard scientific proof why then you’re a Hate Monger and want all the Children to die and want to Poison the Atmosphere and see the Environment destroyed. It’s a Blind Fanatical sort of Knee Jerk Reactionary Force they rely upon to further their agenda. It’s ingrained into the Children in the Schools where the Teachers are predominately Liberal. The Children don’t know enough to question the outrageous claims they are being fed without a shred of evidence. After a while they become Little Brainwashed PC Zombies spouting the party line out of rote memory their Little Skulls full of Mush Twisted by the lies of the Leftist Enviro-Nazzies. It’s become socially acceptable to just believe in this tripe and feel good about your support rather than question the nonsense that can be spouted by supposedly intelligent learned people. In the next few weeks I will address the following hot topics. Sort of like Myth Busters for the Leftist Commie Liberal Propaganda Machine. Tell me if you have ever heard of any of these: 1. The Earth is Warming up due to our Pollution. 2. There’s a Hole in the Ozone Layer and its caused by CFCs and We are All gonna Die. 3. El Nino is caused by Automobile Pollution and Cow Farts 4. We are running out of Land and Overcrowding is a Problem 5. We are Destroying all the Rain Forest at Millions of Acres a Day 6. Over 1500 Children Die each Day from Starvation in 3rd World Countries Let's take a look at a few of these outrageous claims. Over the Next few 'Rants' I will address them with hard science and facts, putting to rest the Populist Feel Good Crap the Al Gores of our country would have us believe. Trust me there is No 'Star Wars Force', No Santa, Easter Bunny or Giea Mother Earth about to wreak death and destruction on us for taking a piss in the woods. My favorite is the Earth warming up and we are all going to bake to death in a hundred years. Well of course the Earth is getting warmer. Remember that Ice Age thing. In fact remember the past 3 Ice Ages. There is a Cycle to the Earth’s Climate. It gets hot then cold. It doesn’t stay the same; we do not live in a Static Environment. It changes daily. People freak out because the Oceans have warmed 3 degrees over the past 100 years. Well guess what 'Snapper Head', its gonna get warmer with or without you no matter what you do or don’t do. We are still coming out of the last Ice Age and will continue to do so for the next twenty three thousand years before the Next Cycle starts to reverse itself and slide back towards the cooler temperatures. It will actually get colder a lot faster than it got warmer. It will only take about three thousand years for Ice to once again cover the Earth down to Ohio if the last few times have been any indication. It will then stay 'ass cold' for the next 80,000 years and slowly warm up again. It’s a Cycle and there’s nothing we can do about it. So deal with it and Stop Bitching. The first Ice Age lasted almost 200,000 years and had almost 10 million before the next one. The intervals are getting shorter and the Ice Period quicker. It's all based on the Sun and the Solar Radiation we receive and how it affects the Global Temperature not Car Emissions. People who worry about Global Warming are the same ones who worry that the Sun will go Nova and eventually shrink to a small White Dwarf in about 15 billion years. Geez, give me a break. Do they plan on being here that long? The fact of the matter is that we have just recently come out of a Mini Ice Age in the last 50 years. These are Short Periods of Brief and Very Cold Climate Spurts that last 3 to 4 Hundred Years. This was recently documented and The Discovery Channel did a Wonderful Episode showing its effects on our recorded history in a series called the MINI ICE AGE. It lasted from the 1600 to the late 1870s. That’s why things like Washington crossing the Delaware depicted on our currency with Ice Flows is not a Fictional Situation it really was that cold but nowadays that never happens. Remember when we were kids and it snowed a foot or more every Winter several times a year. Remember when our Grandparents talked about the snow so deep it came up to the horses ass. My kid has never seen more than 2 inches on the ground. People, we are coming out of an Ice Age - deal with it and adapt. It's nothing we caused - it's Natural. God made it happen and there is Nothing You or Anyone Else can do about it. Next time we address the Myth that Man caused the Ozone Hole with Hair Spray and CFCs. |
DECEMBER
19th, 2005 |
| KISSES
vs LIGHTSABERS: STAR WARS UNDER FIRE This Past weekend I bought the latest episode of the Star Wars Saga on DVD, which is actually number 3 in a 9 series movie line up of which the actual last 3 movies have not yet been made so why this is called the final episode I can not fathom. All my life I have been an on again off again Star Wars fan. I was on when Luke rescued Princess 'Lay Me' (my own term for Carrie Fisher's character) from detention cell block H and then I was off the fan list when the fuzzy Ewoks were introduced to help the "cuddliness factor" and bump up revenues in the toy arena. They reminded me too much of hairy Munchkins and why they would worship C3PO rather than a Wookie who would fit more into their cultural image of a deity is quite beyond me. I was on again as Yoda was introduced and then off again with the horrible Jar Jar Binks. That stupid dialect he introduced to our youth made me just want to puke and slap every little bastard that used his 3rd person Bob Dole like speech patterns. All through the Star Wars Saga we have had a classic storyline. A good guy or good group of people fighting against a bad oppressive superior force. Throw in some soap opera plot twist and a Laurel and Hardy robot team and you got yourself a winner. Why is it then I can’t stand George Lucas’s writing style. I do believe he couldn’t write a sincere moment with drama or passion if his very life depended on it. Sure he can zap it up with the best of them and Vader is my all time favorite heavy in any movie with his commanding presence and James Earl Jones as his voice, but why, Oh why! does he feel the need to interject characters designed to do nothing more than create sales in add on markets that are annoying and not necessary to the story line? Example the aforementioned Binks. Like any really sane senator would leave this blathering idiot as a proxy voter in an actual senate. I’m sure Amadalla's hair dresser would have been a safer bet. At least they showed some risk taking attitude with the carefully coiffure disasters she sported in the movie. Geez, why do people think futuristic means you gotta do weird stuff with your hair. I will bet you a thousand years from now a baseball cap will still be used to cover a bad hair day not some spangley blinking light contraption. But back to the story line. Lucas has two teen aged main characters supposedly in love but its unrequited love because self centered punk ass Annikin and Stuck up frigid Amadalla have to deny their feelings based upon the different paths they have chosen. When they do get together its almost comical in its blandness. Let’s face it they were two good-looking teens with “no controlling authority” as our past Vice President Al Gore would have said. I’m not saying I wanted 'nekidity' but some passion when they declared their love instead of the clinical precision we got on screen would have been much more interesting. Case in point the two are chained together about to enter an arena to face certain death and finally admit their feelings. It went something like “Hey, by the way, I love You” “Oh really, so do I” and that was it. Give me a break. I would have had them in a passionate embrace as they were wheeled out with the bad guys having to pry them out of each others grasp. Something anything would have been better than what we got which was zip. The passion and human element is better exemplified by the stories two non-human characters R2D2 and C3P0. They show more charisma and human characteristics, frailties and personality than any of the shallow quick quipping one liner humans Lucas populates his stories with. They are also the only consistent characters throughout the entire series. That’s right those two are supposedly in every single book of the 9 while all others come and go with the ravages of time, even the centuries old Yoda doesn’t make the full run. I think the reason the series did so well with episode 4, the original movie back in the 1970s, was because it was new and fresh, science fiction not being a big box office seller up to that point and because Lucas for once used a winning proven formula. The good guy, the bad guy, some comic relief, an old mentor passing on the torch, and the good guys won in the end. A classic story line. It’s what made Errol Flynn such a hero of the silver screen. It’s what made every action adventure film work. The protagonist, the antagonist, and the dame in distress. Hell even the Greeks used the formula, just look at the Odyssey or the Iliad. Although I personally believe Helen of Troy was a slut; but, that’s a different rant for another time. If given a choice I would want a bit of human drama and not so many flashy light saber battles in my sci-fi. The future doesn’t have to be so dry and mechanical. A perfect example was the Babylon 5 series it relied on the continuing interaction of the main characters and we grew with them, as we understood them more and more. Or the Stargate series or Far Scape. Once again the human element is as important as the rest of the story itself. Sure you can splash it up with all sorts of science 'doodads' but it all boils down to storyline if you want it to be an interesting story. |
